Managing in Uncertain Times
WISDOM FROM GROVE
Life, especially lately it seems, is full of uncertainty and undesired change. Here is our therapists’ perspective about what helps them navigate these difficult times.
What helps you amidst undesired change or uncertainty?
Life is full of change and uncertainty, and sometimes it comes at us in an overwhelming way. I try to remind myself that I have survived 100% of all the challenges that life has sent my way, and I am likely to continue to do so because each of those challenges provided me with opportunities to learn and grow. I remember my sources of strength and am mindful of what is and is not within my control. I do what I can when I can, and let myself know that it is not up to me to be the solution, but I can take action to care for myself and those around me. These small things we do for ourselves and others can make a big difference when things feel unsteady.
Among more self-care focused strategies, it helps me to reach out to loved ones for support. I try to be intentional, considering who might be able to provide what I need (e.g., a compassionate presence, a problem solver, a healthy distraction). I also want to make sure they're in a place to be able to hold space for me. I find that co-regulation so valuable, and I'm especially lucky to be surrounded by both compassionate and hilarious friends; sharing big belly laughs (especially in the midst of fears and tears) really helps.
Margaret Levasseur, LMSW, CCTP (she/her)
At the beginning of the pandemic in 2020 I was leaving a yoga class. People were talking about feeling anxious, and one of the teachers said "this is just a time and just a place." Good way to remember that nothing is permanent, even the bad stuff.
Teague Simoncic, LMSW, PMH-C (she/her)
When faced with undesired change or uncertainty, I try to start with acceptance and self-compassion for the way I feel. I remind myself that it’s normal to feel frustrated, overwhelmed, or upset when things don’t go as planned. From there, I focus on what’s within my circle of control. For example, I may not be able to prevent my child's school closing for a snow day, but I can check the forecast to anticipate a closure, coordinate with my support system for possible childcare assistance, adjust my work schedule as much as is reasonable, and set up an art or play activity the night before to make the following day just a tiny bit smoother. It’s not perfect, but these small actions help me feel more grounded and remind me that even in disruption, there’s still room for joy - like bundling up and building a snowman with my son in the middle of the workweek.
I try to remember change is constant and has always been happening, we often don't notice it as acutely when the change is desired or (most often) when the change does not impact us directly. If we can agree on this premise, and we are here reading this, we've survived and at times thrived through all the changes we have experienced so far. The odds are in our favor we'll make it through this change too.
Carryn Lund, LMSW, RYT (she/her)
When I get overwhelmed in uncertain times, there are two things I often try to do:
Let someone know. Leaving a friend a voice memo, hugging a family member, and naming how I feel almost always helps.
Start Close In. When I was in Mindful Self-Compassion training, I was introduced to this poem. It reminds me to focus in on what is immediately happening that I can focus on - whether there’s a helpful action step or a shift of attention towards something pleasant.
This blog is one of the offerings of Grove Emotional Health Collaborative. We offer a range of mental health care services. Explore Our Providers or reach out to get started today.
